Do You Like Dinosaurs?
Taking notes on dating from an impeccable piece of culture.
As a millennial who wonders how people organically met their romantic partners before the internet1, I am at the mercy of dating apps in order to… idk be happy in life?? Topic for another therapy session I suppose. But among the thousands of TikToks with conflicting advice, jokes about lackluster online profiles, and trying to decipher whatever “figuring out my dating goals” means under the “Relationship Type” field, I believe I’ve found the north star of adult dating advice. What I really think every adult who goes on dates with strangers from the internet could do better is watch every episode of Love on the Spectrum.
The purity of the participants in Love on the Spectrum, an Australian import with a US-based spinoff that has surpassed the episode-count of the original, teaches me every episode how to do better when approaching dating. The cast, all on the autism spectrum, won’t mess around with ghosting, or playing hard to get, or whatever else we think are the normal pitfalls of modern dating. Instead, the show puts forward its own educational handbook. Let’s take a look at examples:
KNOW YOUR BASICS
Before we meet a new dating candidate on the show, we’re introduced to them by a lovely voiceover telling us some of their basic likes/dislikes with stock footage. If you sit back and think about the top three things you like and dislike, stop there. We want the random, the kooky, the specific.
I for one would love to ask everyone I date this conversation starter of “What would your Love on the Spectrum intro package say?” … if only more people knew what this question meant. Let me try: Ryan likes cold ketchup and concert merchandise. Ryan dislikes books that are too long and irritating tags in clothes.
HONESTY
At the end of every date, our main character lays out how they feel. Whether it’s “I want to remain friends” or “I would like to take you on a second date” or “I don’t see a connection here. Bye!” there is no sugar-coating in sight. I certainly don’t long for the post-date questioning if they liked me back or not, or if they’ll reach out to schedule another date. Conversely, I could learn to be more honest myself. 😬
TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SUPPORTING CHARACTERS
If you’re sitting down to dinner with your date and your plus-one is being weird, it’s okay to just say that to the server. You don’t have to sneak around and ask for the check in private.
ASK YES/NO QUESTIONS
Any viewer of Love on the Spectrum was divinely changed by Tanner’s line of animal questioning. Yes a dating profile can be populated with platitudes about looking for someone curious and spontaneous who likes crazy nights out just as much as cozy nights in (what does this mean; pick one), but unless you can check every box I’m looking for, like our boy Tanner’s meeting with Kate, then, well, look at the above paragraph.
When Tanner said, quote “What are your favorite animals at the zoo? Do you like lizards? Do you like snakes? Do you like tortoises? Do you like frogs? Do you like toads? Do you like sharks? Do you like jellyfish? Do you like octopi? Do you like squid? Do you like whales? Do you like crabs?” … I felt that.
AND SKIP THE SMALL TALK
Don’t ask me about the traffic or how many siblings I have until you know my opinions about squid!!! It’s called a soulmate look it up.
DON’T LOWER YOUR STANDARDS
Where modern internet parlance has us declaring our “brand” on our social media, our friends on Love on the Spectrum sometimes lean on one main quality they seek in a partner. An interest that it’s so important to share with someone that they can’t continue seeing unless they comply. For example, if I match with someone who hasn’t set foot in a movie theater in months, move the fuck along.
On the show, we meet Dani who has one goal and one goal only: to run her own animation studio. If she meets someone who does not match her ambition and passion for animation, it’s a no for her. Don’t lower that bar, queen!
INCLUDING YOUR FAVORITE DINOSAUR
If I asked you how many times one’s favorite dinosaur comes up on a date, your guess would be too low. In 2025, I would not like to meet anyone who does not instantly know what their favorite dinosaur is.
REMEMBER THE ZOO
Do you see an animal-kingdom-based theme? Ever tired of meeting for drinks at a vague bar with $20+ custom cocktails, don’t forget that you can take any date to the zoo or a botanical garden (further research proves I’ve spent more on a cocktail than the price of a Los Angeles Zoo ticket).
PARENTS KNOW BEST
The only people more iconic than our main subjects of this show are their families. You’ve never seen more supportive parents on television before! And we’ll even overlook when Connor’s mother—despite every claim of the opposite— tried to set up her son with a blonde woman. BRUNETTE’S ONLY, said Connor!
While I still remain above the cynical fold of modern dating culture (it’s mostly good, right?), even I know that I can be better and learn and grow. And so my way of taking in the world is obviously learning lessons from a multi-Emmy-Award Winning reality series! So, tired are the days of thinking TV relationships are unattainable— you know, the 9 seasons of on-again-off-again hijinks, or one man giving out roses to 29 women, etc. Television can be educational and enduring and above all else, remind us of the purity of those looking for love I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING.
To say nothing of my curiosity about how people scheduled interdepartmental meetings without digital calendars.